The Rodney Dangerfield of World Dictators

Moral Relativism...to the Extreme by Eric Power

Hitler performing the Macarena. Yes, he
 invented it too! What a hipster!

You know who gets absolutely no respect these days?  The Nazis. I mean sure they did some bad things, I get it. But what about all of the good things that Hitler did?? Not just for Germany, but really, for the whole world. Let's look at a few of them here.

Who Let The Dogs Out??

               Hitler with his German Shepherd
(but of course), Blondi.

Well first and foremost, animal protection. You can't say Hitler didn't love dogs!  He was a rabid (yes, that's a pun) animal rights activist. He passed laws against animal abuse, was a vegetarian and was quite the life at parties, ruining people's appetite with graphic descriptions of animal slaughter practices. Ah, what a hoot he was! The Nazis also banned vivisection against animals and established strict protocols on hunting, many of which have been adopted in our own country today.

Life is a Highway...

Volkswagen wouldn't be who they are today (minus that pesky little EPA violation which has landed them in some pretty hot water lately) without the Nazis. Hitler himself worked closely with the designers of "The People's Car" to manufacture a family vehicle that was cheap, yet reliable and high-performing. The birth of the Beetle, and eventually the "punch-bug game", played by millions of children worldwide, was all thanks to the fearless Führer!

Furthermore in the automotive realm, Hitler brought forth the revolutionary Autobahn. A series of interconnected roads with no speed limits or intersections; they were envisioned to greatly reduce unemployment due to the ability to travel further for better jobs. Also, they were essential for military mobilization and if need be, you could land an aircraft on a straightaway section of the road. Our own interstate highways are a direct descendant of the Autobahn system. So the next time you're sitting in a parking lot on I-75/95/40 etc., give a tip o' the hat to our old buddy Adolf! What a guy, huh?!?

Dr. Dr., Gimme the News...

Great on Pancakes too

Many medical advances may not have been possible, certainly not as early as they were, without contributions from dedicated Nazi scientists of the time. Methadone was invented by the Nazis as a synthetic opiate for pain control on the battlefield.
One of the greatest advances comes in the field of treating hypothermia. Rewarming therapies were pioneered as a direct result of Nazi experiments. Also, we are now able to resuscitate someone who drowned in frigid water, sometimes hours later, due to their tireless work.
We also know much about low-pressure effects on the human body, such as you would experience in a non-pressurized high-altitude aircraft. Modern commercial aviation wouldn't be the same without those ever-concerned National Socialists.

So really, we owe quite a bit to those Germanic dictators across the big pond!  I say we forget about that whole slaughtering Jews by the millions thing, and let bygones be bygones. Right? Right.

Allllrighty then, I think I've
made my point; so until next time, later all!!

...

... ...

... ... .........

Ok, are you guys still here?

Do I have any readers left?

Who's ready to light some torches and raise the pitchforks for a good old fashioned lynch mob? I mean, seriously??  Cheerleading for the Nazis?!? "But Eric!!!!  Look at all the unspeakable evil that they perpetrated in their reign!  The extermination of the Jews and other 'undesirables', conquering Poland, France, EUROPE! Bombing England with V-2 rockets, killing 40,000+ civilians! Etc. etc. etc.!! How does inventing Methadone or the Volkswagen negate the untold loss of life and unadulterated evil that they inflicted upon the world???"

Well...um...

It doesn't.

And most right-thinking people would agree. Really horrible, evil acts tend to overshadow any good a person or group has done. Just ask Benedict Arnold (treason), Lizzie Borden (*alleged* parental homicide), and the pop-music group Hansen (for that truly hideous song, Mmmbop) about being overshadowed. Each one has done good in their lives (yes, even Hansen...well,  so I'm assuming, anyway) but nobody remembers their good deeds when they see those names in the history books.

Yet, somehow, this doesn't seem to hold true for certain entities. There are exceptions to every rule, I suppose. But you would think that this rule would bend towards a person or group who had inflicted far less evil upon the world. Of course, I am speaking of...wait for it!....Planned Parenthood!  Aww, how'd you guess??

So let's just give the benefit of the doubt for 5 minutes and assume that Planned Parenthood actually does all of the services, other than abortion, that makes them so darn essential and wonderful in our world today. The mammograms, (although even the president of Planned Parenthood, Cecile Richards, conceded to Congress, under oath, that PP does not own even one mammogram machine; the best they can do is refer the patient to a clinic that does do them), the preventative birth control, the counseling, the handholding, the hugging and all of it.

Uhh...hello?

THEY'RE STILL KILLING UNBORN BABIES!!! Brutally, mercilessly, murdering the most innocent amongst us!  By the hundreds of thousands, every year!  What part of that fact does not speak directly to the hearts of people?!? They could be managed by the Vatican; if they are doing THAT, it wouldn't matter to me! Shut 'em down, board up the windows, get 'em gone! Get another gig, Pope, this one's toast! But this is what I see all across social media these days. "Well yes, but...look at all the things they do that are good! Who will perform those services if Planned Parenthood goes away??" Could anyone rational make the same argument for the Nazis?  Would the world be better off had they not been ousted from power?

Demonic experiments

Almost nobody with even half a brain excuses the Nazis for the evil they did. Good!  Why should we?!? They could build a road that never got potholes, a car that ran on air, and a pill that instantly cured narcotic addiction. I would rather not have to rationalize the whole "killing Jews" thing; I know, call me wacky. Speaking of all those wonderful accomplishments of the Nazis, there is a caveat that comes along with them. Most medical experiments, if not possibly all, were performed on living, breathing people. Mainly Jews of course. The animals in Hitler's kingdom had more rights than those who were "less than human", in his eyes. So, all of that vivisection that was outlawed? Well, not for the human subjects of these particular medical experiments. Once a study was done, IF the person lived, they could be cut open while alive to see the physiological effect of the experiment on them. The rewarming therapies that were developed?

 Those came from experiments where people were submerged in ice filled tubs of water for hours and hours. Maybe they died; maybe to "rewarm" them, they then threw them in a vat of boiling water. Pressurized cabins?  Put a bunch of Jews into a simulated pressurization chamber and see what happens when the pressure drops to near zero. Oh they died?  Well what happens when an overpressurized cabin experiences sudden depressurization? Oh, their heads explode. Hmm! Ok, write that down and clean up this mess for the next group of "subjects". And on, and on...and on.

Thanks, But I'll Pass

So believe me, I would have been willing to wait a bit on the medical advances we gained from the Nazis if it would have spared the lives of those that were brutally tortured and killed. Likewise, the babies that are dissected, vivisected, chopped up and sold like select cuts of beef, are supposedly used for scientific studies.  Call me rigid and close-minded, but I just don't like the idea of people dying in unmentionably horrific ways, just so that I may live a bit easier. It's morbidly ironic, that while Hitler was vehemently in favor of animal rights, he was certainly okay with the horrific slaughter of sentient beings simply because he didn't like their beliefs, lifestyle, or their bloodline.
So for any good that Hitler and the Nazis may have accomplished, it was washed away by the four oceans of innocent blood that they spilled in their quest for racial purity.

How is Planned Parenthood any different? They torture and kill babies. End of story.  No really, this is the end this time. Thanks for reading, and God bless.